The baby is a little over two years old now and could certainly be called their little “Angel.” This is one of those miracle stories where everyone wins, but most importantly the baby wins.
This is a story about adoption and because November is national adoption month we have visited with a Price family, who is proud of their beautiful little daughter.
“She is such a doll, so sweet and good natured. She brightens our home and has changed our lives forever. We find it hard to remember what occupied our hearts and our time before she came to us,” says her parents Cindy and Jay Young.
Because this is a closed adoption all names have been changed to respect their anonymity.
They tried to have children for many years but never could. Cindy recalls, “Despite extensive medical testing and procedures, we never did find out why we could not have a baby.”
According to the Youngs, there are volumes of journals written about birth control but there was comparatively little research on infertility. Cindy said, “Some expensive fertility procedures only offered a 20 percent success.”
“So we chose adoption as the next step,” says Cindy. Then came the months of paper work, fingerprinting, criminal background checks and home visits. Finally 10 months later they made the waiting list.
The anticipation of waiting was a roller coaster ride at times for the Youngs, not only during the years of medically trying to conceive a baby, but also waiting for the call from their case worker. “It was also sometimes difficult for us but also for our families and friends, always wondering and waiting,” says Cindy.
“We knew that becoming parents through medical procedures was an “if” but going through adoption would make parenthood a “when” not “if” for us,” they said.
Jay adds, “Once we started the adoption process, we never really worried a lot about it. We were confident that someday at the right time it would happen, and we would be parents.”
“And sure enough, after two years of waiting, we got the phone call. Our caseworker told us that a college-age birth mother had chosen us, and that the baby was going to be a girl.”
The birth mother made her decision after reviewing five sets of potential parents. Each profile included a letter from the couple telling about themselves, pictures, and a listing of hobbies, education and physical descriptions. “We later learned,” Jay notes, “that when the birth mother read our letter in our profile, she felt an overwhelming impression that we were the parents for her baby.”
The next step for the Youngs was meeting the birth mother. “We were nervous before the meeting but very excited that she had chosen us as the family to raise her baby,” recalls Cindy, adding, “It didn’t occur to us that she would be very nervous as well.”
When they met and gave each other hugs all the nervousness went away. Cindy remembers, “We spent an amazing hour visiting with her. She said that she felt strongly that her baby needed to have a family with both a mother and a father, something she could not provide at the time. She also shared with us some things that she hoped for the baby, that we could read good books to her and play beautiful music for her.” Within a month the baby was born.
Under Utah law, a birth mother can sign the adoption papers once the baby is 24 hours old and once the papers are signed the baby can be placed. Final adoption is not legalized for six months pending visitations by social services. It is during this time period that the process of bonding and attachment take place.
Within 27 hours after delivery the birth mother placed the new little “Angel” in the arms of her new parents.
Jay recalls, “The first few hours with our new baby girl were magical, one of those moments in life that imprint on your mind and you never forget. We’ll always remember our drive home and our stops for the first feeding and diaper change. We even remember the music that was playing in the car at the time.”
The Youngs began sending the birth mother pictures of the baby immediately after they brought her home.”At first it was a letter and pictures every week, and then for the next year it was once a month,” Cindy explains. This really gives the birth mother peace of mind to see the baby being loved and cared for so well.
After the first year the new family is limited to sending a letter and only one picture a year, on her second and third birthdays. After the third birthday only annual letters are allowed under the Young’s adoption contract and policies.
“It was such a positive experience and a privilege to send the letters and pictures to the birth mother,” says Cindy, commenting, “We have so much love and respect for her.”
Jay adds, “She truly sacrificed her own wants and desire for what she felt would be the best life for her baby. She knew that she would very much miss watching her daughter grow up and would miss being a daily part of her life. Her decision was one of courage and love.”
“The baby will hear from us that she is adopted even before she understands what adoption is,” says Cindy. “She will know the special way she came to us. We will teach her about her birth mother and we hope our daughter will have every desire to meet her when she is old enough. We anticipate this future meeting to be a positive experience for everyone involved, not a threatening one.”
“We look forward to adopting another child and having a brother or sister for our little Angel,” say the Youngs. “The adoption process has been nothing short of wonderful for our family.”
Little ‘Angel’ blesses Price family
